Sunday, June 14, 2009

Warning! I'm in a pissy, whiny mood and feeling quite sorry for myself.

Last night I went to see a movie with my sister. State of Play, a political thriller. About 15 minutes into the movie, just as the congressman and the journalist meet face to face for the first time, I had to leave to use the bathroom. (That's the polite way of saying that my stomach hurt bad and I knew I had only a short time to make it to the restroom.) I returned to the theater about 10 minutes later but knew better than to sit down as I would probably have to leave again. This time I was able to stay for about 5 minutes, long enough to learn that two apparently unrelated characters had a connection to each other. Looking like a really great movie. But I wouldn't know because I spent most of the first 45 minutes of it in the bathroom, gripped by severe abdominal pain and pooping liquid.

I should have known this might happen and not even tried to go to a movie, especially not one that requires you to actually watch the whole thing to know what's happening. I know that I need to sit on the aisle in case I need to get up to leave. I gauge how I feel before I take my dog for a walk that will take me far from the nearest bathroom.

No, I don't have colitis or IBS. What I have is the side effects of a medication that is supposed to regulate my blood sugar. It doesn't appear to be having any effects on anything except my bowel.

I have diabetes and right now I'm really pissed about that! I'm doing the things I should to control my blood sugar but it continues to climb. So my doctor added in the dread drug that causes the diarrhea, metformin. I've taken it before and stopped because frankly, it's difficult to swallow a pill you know will likely give you severe diarrhea and associated cramping. Usually the side effects pass, but never completely. I've been back on this medication for about 3 weeks and the diarrhea is subsiding. A bit. I leave in 4 days on a roadtrip with my daughter. I'm intending to continue taking the medication while I'm gone but I'm not sure how practical that will be. I'll have to see how it goes. I really want to be "compliant" with my treatment plan to see if it makes any difference in the numbers at my next check in 2 months.

I think I wouldn't mind the side effects so much if I thought my numbers were improving. But, each time I poke my finger, I see little, if any, difference in the number staring back at me. But I keep taking the diarrhea pill in the vain hope that when I go back in a couple months, I'll see a difference in the number that matters, the A1C (a measure of blood sugar control over the past 3 months). I'm specifically trying to not make any other changes to my lifestyle that may affect my blood sugar during these 3 months; I want to know if the metformin actually has any effect on my blood sugar. If the number improves, I want to know it's from the medication, not assume that but know it could be related to dietary changes or increases in exercise. If metformin doesn't do anything positive for me, there's no sense in putting up with the side effects, right?

Back to the movie: My sister graciously suggested that we leave when I finally returned to my seat. I had missed too much to ever figure out what was going on. We stopped at the customer service desk and got a refund. I'd like to try again. But I'm afraid the same thing will happen again. I guess I'll just wait for video.

(I warned you I was feeling sorry for myself!)

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